Friday, August 22, 2008

Shuffled At 11:23 PM

Love Me  - Elvis Presley  (Elvis Presley: The Top Ten Hits)
Up Against (Blackout) - Taking Back Sunday  (Louder Now)
Rosealia - Better Than Ezra (Deluxe)
Pressure Point - The Zutons (Who Killed the Zutons?)
Chicago - Ingram Hill (June's Picture Show)
Unwell (Live Acoustic) - Matchbox Twenty Watch the Video Here!
Gracie - Ben Folds (Songs For Silverman)
This Time Of Year - Better Than Ezra (Deluxe)
Bound for the Floor - Local H (As Good as Dead)
Error: Operator - Taking Back Sunday (Louder Now)

Gotta give it up to MB20 this time.  No really.  Unwell completely expresses how I felt about myself for a very long time and still do from time to time.  Noah has grounded me, but every now and then I just feel like I used to in my late teens all the way up to my mid 20s.  I remember my attempt at suicide and how God saved me.  I truly believed He intervened and gave the Emergency Room doctor the ability to save my life.  My heart actually stopped for a few seconds.  He saved me I feel to create Noah.  I don't know if that is really why God wanted me to live, but it is what I believe and that is all that matters.  However, I still have my mental issues as I put it.  I take my pills and I go see a Psychiatrist and I do what I can to be a good husband to Audra, a good brother to Travis and Jason, a good son to my mom and foremost a good father to Noah.  I know that I slip from time to time, but hey so does everyone else.  I just hope I don't slip too far.  I don't know if I will ever feel 100%, but at least I know that I'm not crazy...I'm just a little Unwell.

1 comment:

Unknown said...

I can honestly say that I'm glad you're still around, my brother.

As for the song I'd choose: Rosealia. That CD has a lot of fond memories with it. Channel Z and all of us in our early years of college come to mind.